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Mother/daughter relationship proves hard in life and death

Dear Annie: I’m writing to ask your opinion about whether I should include my estranged daughter in my will. She accused me of something very vile that never happened and spread it throughout the family. She also broke her younger sister’s heart for another reason. I have a grandson I’m not allowed to see, and communication with my daughter is nonexistent. I have moved 1,000 miles away to avoid the drama. Since I’m no longer welcome in her life, should I even consider her when I die? -- Devastated in Alabama Dear Devastated: Wills are a bookend to human life and can include ...

Using a white board for reminders

Dear Heloise: My husband is in an assisted living facility. I keep an erasable white board in his room. When a visit or trip is planned, I write it on the board. It helps him remember, and the staff loves it. This way, they make sure he’s ready. I also write sport schedules. In addition, I keep the same type of board in the garage. I write reminders to get gas, fill bird feeders, take something into the house, bring something into the garage, etc. It saves standing in the mudroom and trying to remember what I came in for. Thank you. -- Barb Crandell, via email DEVICE FOR THE ...

Caught between daughter and granddaughter

Dear Annie: My daughter, 31, left home at 19 to attend university. Within weeks, she began dating a boy she’d met through the school’s Facebook group. Coming from our cultural background, we weren’t comfortable with relationships outside marriage, but after two years, she moved in with him, mostly on her terms. They lived together for six years, bought a house, got a dog, eventually married and, two and a half years later, had my precious granddaughter. My daughter has always dominated her marriage. Everything has to be on her terms. She’s intelligent, determined and ...

Saying ‘thank you’ is a lost art

Dear Heloise: Over the years, I have sent many wedding and graduation gifts in the form of cash tucked into cards. About 1 in 20 gifts resulted in a thank-you note. And I know why. The envelopes are opened, the cash is separated from the card, and no note is made as to who gave what and how much. Now some people simply don’t have the good manners to respond, and others don’t know to whom or how to respond. I now give personal checks. My name and address are embossed on the checks. And, of course, the dollar amounts are readily apparent. Hence, there are no excuses for bad manners. ...

Regional Calendar

The Independent calendar lists upcoming meetings, facility hours and events in and around Marshall. To have your group’s events listed, email the information to news@marshallindependent.com or submit the information to our virtual newsroom. Today AA (Book study), 8 a.m., Open Door Church, 77 North Bruce Street. Marshall-Lyon County Library hours 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., 201 C St. Santa’s Workshop vendor event, 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., Minneota VFW and Legion. MAFAC Arts Center and Gift Shop 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., 109 N. 3rd., downtown Marshall. For more info, call 532-5463. Lyon County ...

On this Date

In 1862: Union forces led by Maj. Gen. Ambrose Burnside launched failed frontal assaults against entrenched Confederate soldiers during the Civil War Battle of Fredericksburg; the soundly defeated Northern troops withdrew two days later after suffering heavy casualties. In 1937: During the Second Sino-Japanese War, Japanese soldiers captured the Chinese city of Nanjing and began what would be a weekslong massacre of an estimated 200,000 to 300,000 citizens, war prisoners and soldiers. In 1996: The U.N. Security Council chose Kofi Annan of Ghana to become the world body’s seventh ...