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Beaned by beans

April 2, 2013 - Karin Elton
Ya know it’s hard out there for an insurance agent just tryin’ to get a little tomato juice and beer. (See “Charged with assault” letter to the editor.)

After parking his camper at the wayside rest in the middle of beautiful downtown Lynd, Gerhard Ziemann of Buffalo Lake is abruptly awakened by shouts from megaphone-carrying ministers alerting one and all to the negative aspects of staring at young women with an unnatural interest in poles.

He thought as long as he was up he would open a can of pork and beans to go along with a sandwich. Well, you can’t eat all that without liquid refreshment and there is a place right across the street advertised as a juice bar.

So here he was, going to the “Juice Bar” in Lynd, looking for ... juice. Inexplicably, since you would think it would have every variety of juice, Gerhard doesn’t find it there. So he walks down the main drag to the Lyndwood Tex-Mex Bar and Grill and is finally able to purchase tomato juice to add to his beer or as a chaser, I don’t know.

After leaving the bar — carrying his beans for some reason, he said he was accosted by the two megaphone-carrying preachers.

In pure self defense he throws his beans up in the air and they happen to fall on the preachers and their megaphone.

The preachers, not appreciating being bathed in beans, called the cops. It will be interesting to hear how the case of bean battery pans out.


Article Comments



Apr-03-13 10:59 AM

Story time?

Once upon a time, some perv's pooled their resources and opened Booby Flops. One was responsible for transporting the Boobys to the Flop House in a conversion van, getting a cut for his efforts.

Only his cut is whittled away by some do-good-jerk-em-to-Jesus fanatics with a bullhorn running off potential patrons. Seeing his cut being spooked off again and again, he leaps from his van in a fit of rage, stalks the well meaning verbal friends of Jesus and douses them with the canned contents of Van Camp's finest. The Jesus people, blessed with vision and a low pedestrian traffic count in Lynd, are aware they're being charged by an angry 385 pound man. Angels, tight with Jesus, urge the warriors of Christ to turn on their video recording device.

They now have what's called evidence.

Toklat the Transporter tells tales of tomato juice craving and preferring to camp 12 feet off the RR tracks.

The end.


Apr-03-13 9:39 AM

The Juice bar,in Lynd is no longer open,that's good.The bad is,he moved his **** shop,to a little town in Northern Iowa.So the same old thing start's again,with the town not knowing what,Mr Peterson is up to ? This guy live's,for the thrill of ambushing little town's with his ***** sideshow's.I think free publicity is a major goal there. Mr Ziemann,I(believe)is not a victim of circumstance as he so solemnly swear's to,in his blatant attempt at tainting the possible,future jury pool? Drama is wonderful thing isn't it :)


Apr-03-13 9:14 AM

JenPep - In the letter to the editor, the guy says he's 5-11, 365 pounds. I highly doubt he was going to waste any of his beans by throwing them on the guys on purpose....


Apr-02-13 7:26 PM

No. Preachers preaching hate is a bad joke. What this man wrote in his letter to the editor was that he was there hunting, had no idea about the juice bar controversy and was incorrectly accosted by those protesting the juice bar.

Apr-02-13 4:44 PM

So you are a pervert that wants to look at naked young women and eat beans. You are mad that someone is telling you not to so you throw your beans at them? You are not grown up enough to just walk by them and ignore them. You have an anger issue and through stuff at this guy. He has a right to say whatever he wants it is his first amendment right and you do not have the right to throw things at people. This article is like a bad joke.


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