Cheap shots?

It’s been a while since I had to take a kid in to get immunizations shots. My twin girls needed their seventh grade shots, so I took care of that today. They needed a tetanus, diphtheria, pertussis vaccine and I threw in a chicken pox for good measure since the one they had when they were infants has laid an egg apparently.

I’m not sure of the Gardisil shot, the one for human papillomavirus, so I didn’t get that for them. It’s too new. Also, I find the commercial offensive. It’s grammatically incorrect. They should say, “I want to be one fewer,” not “I want to be one less.” If you can count something, like people, it’s fewer. All those grocery store signs saying “10 items or less” are incorrect! The nerve! I sense the commercial people deliberately ignored the laws of grammar because “I want to be one less” sounds better than “I want to be one fewer.” But what are they teaching these young girls? That it’s OK to promiscuously throw around bad grammar?

While we waited for our shots, the girls used their time to critique me from head to toe. My eyebrows need plucking, my white shirt is too short and has stains on it, my Capri pants are too youthful for someone my age. I thought my brown and tan bracelet would be acceptable because one of them made it. But no. The wooden beads are round and clash with the stripes on my pants.

The girls gave me a real “shot in the arm” for my self-esteem level. A confidence booster, you might say.

To make matters worse, I was the one that got stuck with the bill from their shots!